“One may have a blazing hearth in one’s soul,

and yet no one ever comes to sit by it.”

---Vincent Van Gogh


I continue to be happily immersed in Introvert Power: Why Your Inner Life is Your Hidden Strength. I’ll keep you posted on the book, but I’m writing to share something that touched me—something about October.

October, I have discovered, was the month, over 100 years ago, when Vincent Van Gogh entered, and soon lost, a stormy partnership that marked his descent into madness. As I look out at grey skies, falling rain and fallen leaves, as I hear of families ravished by the California fires, I think of the fire within Van Gogh and his friend Paul Gauguin, and the tragic end to their collaboration.

I tend to avoid tragic literature and films--I'm a sucker for the Hollywood Happy Ending, but Van Gogh has taught me that tragedy is not just, well, tragic, but also can be inspiring. Tragedy helps us recognize the limitations of human effort. Tragedy gives us pause, instills a kind of reverence, and gives access to the shared reality of loss. This is loss without explanation or blame. Just loss. Just sad, and yet, the glue that binds peoples’ souls. Van Gogh’s story is our story. He was an intensely private man—an introvert—who longed for a relationship big enough to embrace his fiery intensity. When he found Gauguin, he imagined he would be that friend, an artist he admired deeply.

Gauguin was not that friend, and it was not his fault. It was not Van Gogh’s fault for wanting more. But during their brief collaboration, they both painted intense beauty--October beauty, a legacy to their relationship. But when Gauguin moved out of the house they shared, they both suffered greatly: Van Gogh lost his mind and eventually took his own life; Gauguin felt the blood on his hands – people blamed him, and perhaps still do. If you get a chance to read the letters between the two artists, Gauguin responds to this sentiment and exposes his own suffering.

For all of you who have lost relationships or have lost a dream, I dedicate October to you, along with Van Gogh and Gauguin, my two favorite artists. As you relish the vivid colors of Fall, remember: the painful stories also hold amazing beauty. And the painful stories are shared stories. You are never alone.

Blessings, Laurie